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Friday, October 10, 2008

It's not so crazy anymore

I even forgot what for but I believe that things have changed so much. Cagayan de Oro City has changed. There is the danged Night Cafe but I don't even care to rant about it anymore. I am here alone and I thought it would be different, that my presence here in Cagayan de Oro City would make a difference in our lives. Maybe it has made a difference, maybe it has served to uncover the fiction of who I really am.

I may have discovered the real me, the one that is not in my mind but the one that exists in other people's minds. I do not really care and my life has been lived the way it has been and I may change enough to make a difference in whatever is left of this life. There is really nothing much that I can see. I do not really count and my insignificance only serves to make me realize how great the universe is and how tiny Cagayan de Oro City is.

Does it matter at all what happens from now on? I am off to Dumaguete tomorrow and I can see nothing great that can happen from me going. Nothing is going to happen if I stayed. There is nothing that will change, I think.

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